I think I know what's the most frequently uttered word in my world now - its Bloomberg. New York's mayor must have his eyes twitch frequently throughout the day as millions upon millions of conversations speak his name.
One colleague sent out an email saying how despondent he was that he didn't seem to be adding value to his clients. His senior colleague had asked the client about him (who was assigned to cover the client) and the client had said...
Senior colleague: By the way, what do you think of D***?
Client: D***? Havent heard of it, whats the Bloomberg code?
Ouch.
Others frequently heard -
"WTF is wrong with the f***ing Bloomberg, its hanging, f***k f***k!!!"
"Get it from Bloomberg."
"My PT on Bloomberg is wrong!"
"Omg.. results out.. Bloomberg said so, look!!"
------------------
Wake me up when September ends. Or wait, wake me up after April 2011 ends.
Sitting in the car workshop lounge waiting for my car to get fixed - I think the fella finally gave in after months of putting off trips to the mechanic. Seeing my little Myvi being suspended in the air while the mechanics tinker with it.. and working via remote access.
Today's the last day of corporate reporting results for me; and then its off to Thailand The Land of Smiles for the long Merdeka weekend. Took me 5 minutes to pack, as I'm going there with a totally empty suitcase.
Am now a prepared Bangkok traveller after last year. Getting ready to take advantage of sellers desperate to be rid of wares after the major tourist pullout in 1H of this year. Or maybe not. We shall recky the area when we land.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
ive forgotten
I am most likely going out of my mind - its getting to the point where I consciously have to tell my mind not to go there.
But where's there?
There is where I start thinking my life is getting quite meaningless, chasing after something my ego thinks it needs - a stellar jetsetting career at the expense of relationships and sanity. There is where I realize I have serious control issues, and where I actually believe that if I stop moving, everything around me will collapse.
It's gotten to the point where I avoid anything that could trigger those thoughts on a deeper level. Maybe if I just hold out til the bonus next year, then I can quit and work on growing my soul.
But I am reading Eat, Pray, Love now (for somebody who doesn't touch self-helppy books with a ten foot pole, I'm one to talk) and it scares the living bejesus out of me that I find so much to describe myself to the point the book is peppered with dog ears.
There has been those moments - sweatily climbing up the higgledy piggledy steps near Stanley street on Hong Kong Island looking for a famed dessert place, walking briskly from client office to client office on 3 inch stilettos in Hong Kong's massive covered snaking overhead bridges, standing over the window overlooking Singapore's Marina Bay with the evening glow casting a low light on the spires of the financial district.
Those small portions of time I take for myself, eagerly clinging on to them with a soul so dry and thirsty that I sometimes have even forgotten how to secure moments with my own hands. The more reports I write, stocks I chase, clients I pitch to, day in day out over long corporate lunches, in glitzy offices to swanky lounges, I slowly forget how to..... write.
I've forgotten how to describe moments - they just pass by too fast. The fading thought that I once decided I wanted this - this mad kaleidoscopic rush - is surely but slowly losing its lustre.
But where's there?
There is where I start thinking my life is getting quite meaningless, chasing after something my ego thinks it needs - a stellar jetsetting career at the expense of relationships and sanity. There is where I realize I have serious control issues, and where I actually believe that if I stop moving, everything around me will collapse.
It's gotten to the point where I avoid anything that could trigger those thoughts on a deeper level. Maybe if I just hold out til the bonus next year, then I can quit and work on growing my soul.
But I am reading Eat, Pray, Love now (for somebody who doesn't touch self-helppy books with a ten foot pole, I'm one to talk) and it scares the living bejesus out of me that I find so much to describe myself to the point the book is peppered with dog ears.
There has been those moments - sweatily climbing up the higgledy piggledy steps near Stanley street on Hong Kong Island looking for a famed dessert place, walking briskly from client office to client office on 3 inch stilettos in Hong Kong's massive covered snaking overhead bridges, standing over the window overlooking Singapore's Marina Bay with the evening glow casting a low light on the spires of the financial district.
Those small portions of time I take for myself, eagerly clinging on to them with a soul so dry and thirsty that I sometimes have even forgotten how to secure moments with my own hands. The more reports I write, stocks I chase, clients I pitch to, day in day out over long corporate lunches, in glitzy offices to swanky lounges, I slowly forget how to..... write.
I've forgotten how to describe moments - they just pass by too fast. The fading thought that I once decided I wanted this - this mad kaleidoscopic rush - is surely but slowly losing its lustre.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
he who laughs last...
It's surprising how cheap things get in Melaka. Up here, I'm used to paying hundreds of dollars for something. I recently needed a transporter to cart my piano up to KL from my Melaka home. Some initial scouting found a company who could do it for RM500.
Then my mum comes and tells me she knows someone who knows someone who can transport the piano up for RM50. Now the RM500 positively sounds like daylight robbery.
The only catch was that - my piano had to be wrapped in airtight plastic because it was going to be sharing a lorry with .... food.
"As long as I don't see bits of raw chicken on my piano." I said darkly.
I mean, it's RM50. Just shut up and take it, lah.
--------------------------
"Actually there's this tour I thought of joining. They take you around the country and show you the important areas...." he continued on.
"Uh huh.." I was half listening.
"Yeah but it starts at 9am.. and then we're going by foot, but in some areas we get to go by buggy. Might be tiring..."
"Uh huh.. where's this thing.." I asked.
"Well, the meetup point is blablabla..."
"What? Where's that?"
"This meeting point in the game.." he explained.
"You're... going for a tour... in a game... on your computer?!" My thoughts on coming up with an powerful angle for my next report just went out the window. I just didn't know what else to say. Then I started laughing like tomorrow would never come.
"Why can't you just read the game manual like everyone else? Why must you join a .. a ... virtual tour?! And how can you be tired? You're not even walking in real life! Please don't tell me you had to pay for this!!" I kept chortling.
"I'm not telling you what I do in my spare time ever again."
"I agree!!! Hahahahahaha!!"
Then my mum comes and tells me she knows someone who knows someone who can transport the piano up for RM50. Now the RM500 positively sounds like daylight robbery.
The only catch was that - my piano had to be wrapped in airtight plastic because it was going to be sharing a lorry with .... food.
"As long as I don't see bits of raw chicken on my piano." I said darkly.
I mean, it's RM50. Just shut up and take it, lah.
--------------------------
"Actually there's this tour I thought of joining. They take you around the country and show you the important areas...." he continued on.
"Uh huh.." I was half listening.
"Yeah but it starts at 9am.. and then we're going by foot, but in some areas we get to go by buggy. Might be tiring..."
"Uh huh.. where's this thing.." I asked.
"Well, the meetup point is blablabla..."
"What? Where's that?"
"This meeting point in the game.." he explained.
"You're... going for a tour... in a game... on your computer?!" My thoughts on coming up with an powerful angle for my next report just went out the window. I just didn't know what else to say. Then I started laughing like tomorrow would never come.
"Why can't you just read the game manual like everyone else? Why must you join a .. a ... virtual tour?! And how can you be tired? You're not even walking in real life! Please don't tell me you had to pay for this!!" I kept chortling.
"I'm not telling you what I do in my spare time ever again."
"I agree!!! Hahahahahaha!!"
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
hiding from my mind
I.. I... I....
am hiding. From my thoughts.
Those thoughts of late have centred on where I'm headed to in life, and just how much is enough. Matters are complicated further when I hear every other day about people much younger than me getting married.
Met a uni junior of mine for lunch, and she's engaged. I go on Facebook, and my sister's high school classmate is getting married next year too.
Have they found something I haven't? Or conversely, is my life so full now that I don't need forever ever after?
The full impact of turning 26 is probably only just settling in. I have so much more I want to do and see, that time, in all its glory, is running out.
This new job has opened up a world of possibilities. But in return, I pay a very high price. Whether it is all worth it, it depends what time of day I ask myself that question.
Coming off a high where my report caught the stock price on its incredible upward shot, I'll probably say the euphoria is worth it. On evenings when I come back brain-drained, maybe it's not so worth it after all.
All this while, he's been quietly supporting me and listening to my half-mad rants about quitting just about every other day. And I'm grateful.
But I'm so tired of hearing "pls just take it easy and go on" and all I want to do is rest my head down and let someone else take the spotlight. I want to be behind somebody, being the backstage supporter for once.
Because life isn't about the mad highs and being the star attraction. I've chased the highs and rode the lows, dreamt of exciting escapades and running away to set up a beach bar in an exotic country. Much like how people move overseas to a foreign environment to be with the one they love, its the same where you stay where you are because you've found something that's worth more?
I am still asking myself that question. Will I regret it one day?
I gave up the opportunity almost twice, and day by day it slips away.
I feel so old tonight.
am hiding. From my thoughts.
Those thoughts of late have centred on where I'm headed to in life, and just how much is enough. Matters are complicated further when I hear every other day about people much younger than me getting married.
Met a uni junior of mine for lunch, and she's engaged. I go on Facebook, and my sister's high school classmate is getting married next year too.
Have they found something I haven't? Or conversely, is my life so full now that I don't need forever ever after?
The full impact of turning 26 is probably only just settling in. I have so much more I want to do and see, that time, in all its glory, is running out.
This new job has opened up a world of possibilities. But in return, I pay a very high price. Whether it is all worth it, it depends what time of day I ask myself that question.
Coming off a high where my report caught the stock price on its incredible upward shot, I'll probably say the euphoria is worth it. On evenings when I come back brain-drained, maybe it's not so worth it after all.
All this while, he's been quietly supporting me and listening to my half-mad rants about quitting just about every other day. And I'm grateful.
But I'm so tired of hearing "pls just take it easy and go on" and all I want to do is rest my head down and let someone else take the spotlight. I want to be behind somebody, being the backstage supporter for once.
Because life isn't about the mad highs and being the star attraction. I've chased the highs and rode the lows, dreamt of exciting escapades and running away to set up a beach bar in an exotic country. Much like how people move overseas to a foreign environment to be with the one they love, its the same where you stay where you are because you've found something that's worth more?
I am still asking myself that question. Will I regret it one day?
I gave up the opportunity almost twice, and day by day it slips away.
I feel so old tonight.
Monday, July 26, 2010
smash bang pow
I must first start by saying that the IKEA Detolf glass display cabinet is most likely not made of tempered glass - but more of tampered glass. Bought one over the weekend to display my porcelain doll collection and when we were in the midst of fixing it ie he was holding it up in the air above my head while i was sitting on the floor hanging on to the base to steady the structure, the glass just shattered.
Shattered into a million pieces which went flying across the room and mostly, well mostly rained on my head. I got cuts on my hands and legs as a result while he got a pretty nasty gash on his hand.
Thank god for his company health policy, otherwise I would have friggin sued IKEA.
They cursorily apologized and said they would refund me. By that time I had wasted 6 hours of my precious weekend on them and could stand no more so I just took whatever they offered - which is to come by my house on Monday to pick up the remains of the would-be cabinet.
As I said to them "You're lucky consumers here aren't that savvy or they just don't care. I'm surprised you haven't got sued yet on this thing."
I know, I know, I should have held firm. But for what? To deal with idiots? My weekend is just too valuable to give up nowadays. Time is the rarity I so crave.
---------------------
Heading to Hong Kong in two weeks for a work trip and taking my mother along.
It's just cheapskate me taking advantage of a 1000 dollar hotel room to spring a trip for my mother, one which I couldn't have afforded otherwise. And while I'm working, I plan to book her on those one day tours and send her around some temples or something.
I think she digs temples. She liked the Bali ones, so the Hong Kong ones shouldn't be too different.
----------------------
I cut bangs.
First time in I think, a decade.
Yes, a decade.
A decade ago I was 16 and crushing really bad.
And right after I got bangs yesterday, I realized .... that I can't do bangs.
*bang* *pow*
Shattered into a million pieces which went flying across the room and mostly, well mostly rained on my head. I got cuts on my hands and legs as a result while he got a pretty nasty gash on his hand.
Thank god for his company health policy, otherwise I would have friggin sued IKEA.
They cursorily apologized and said they would refund me. By that time I had wasted 6 hours of my precious weekend on them and could stand no more so I just took whatever they offered - which is to come by my house on Monday to pick up the remains of the would-be cabinet.
As I said to them "You're lucky consumers here aren't that savvy or they just don't care. I'm surprised you haven't got sued yet on this thing."
I know, I know, I should have held firm. But for what? To deal with idiots? My weekend is just too valuable to give up nowadays. Time is the rarity I so crave.
---------------------
Heading to Hong Kong in two weeks for a work trip and taking my mother along.
It's just cheapskate me taking advantage of a 1000 dollar hotel room to spring a trip for my mother, one which I couldn't have afforded otherwise. And while I'm working, I plan to book her on those one day tours and send her around some temples or something.
I think she digs temples. She liked the Bali ones, so the Hong Kong ones shouldn't be too different.
----------------------
I cut bangs.
First time in I think, a decade.
Yes, a decade.
A decade ago I was 16 and crushing really bad.
And right after I got bangs yesterday, I realized .... that I can't do bangs.
*bang* *pow*
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
if the chipboard can't be cut, why buy it?
If the chipboard can't be cut into any shape I like, why pay RM3k extra to construct a cookie cutter piece of furniture then?
Thats the thought thats been on my mind these past few days. Working with the guys at the storage solutions company to build storage space for this weirdly angled wall. Turns out the solution they propose creates a lot of dead space, and no amount of strategizing on my end can solve matters, just because they can't cut a shelf that's in the shape of triangle on one end to fit the odd angles.
If you can't do a job well, why do it?
I hate doing haphazard work.
But I'm so burnt out, it takes twice the amount of time to do what I'd normally accomplish in one sitting. It's not that the job is hard, or the details too boring. It's just plain and simple - I'm burnt. Toast. Crisp.
Then I think about the bills I've racked up for the house, and I bend my head down to the grind resignedly.
Working out the fastest way to repay everything - go without my favourite Japanese dinners at Rakuzen / Kampachi and basically just stop buying anything except hawker food and paying for parking, for 6 months.
That way, it'll clear off and I'll be able to splurge in London's Boxing Day sales.
The hardest thing in the world to do is to hold back on your comfort food when you've got nothing else to look forward to. I can't very well eat my house, can I?
Thats the thought thats been on my mind these past few days. Working with the guys at the storage solutions company to build storage space for this weirdly angled wall. Turns out the solution they propose creates a lot of dead space, and no amount of strategizing on my end can solve matters, just because they can't cut a shelf that's in the shape of triangle on one end to fit the odd angles.
If you can't do a job well, why do it?
I hate doing haphazard work.
But I'm so burnt out, it takes twice the amount of time to do what I'd normally accomplish in one sitting. It's not that the job is hard, or the details too boring. It's just plain and simple - I'm burnt. Toast. Crisp.
Then I think about the bills I've racked up for the house, and I bend my head down to the grind resignedly.
Working out the fastest way to repay everything - go without my favourite Japanese dinners at Rakuzen / Kampachi and basically just stop buying anything except hawker food and paying for parking, for 6 months.
That way, it'll clear off and I'll be able to splurge in London's Boxing Day sales.
The hardest thing in the world to do is to hold back on your comfort food when you've got nothing else to look forward to. I can't very well eat my house, can I?
Thursday, July 1, 2010
krabi is the dirtiest place on earth
Had no idea Krabi wasn't an island until we touched down.
Me - "Where's the sea?" *peers out of airplane while we are circling the airport*
Mouse - "What sea?"
Me- "We're in Krabi. Aren't we supposed to be surrounded by sea on all sides?"
Mouse - "Krabi isn't an island."
Me - "WHAT?!??!"
Unfortunately my A for PMR geography didn't encompass learning about Thailand.
-----------------------
Our villa was nice, but it is so far in the boondocks. Good I guess if all you wanna do is bonk all day. We ended up hiring a driver to drive us around to a spa, Ao Nang etc.
Naturally being blessedly unfortunate souls we are, the one restaurant we went to hunt for had closed down. The one we ended up with was pretty good - Ban Lay Thai Kitchen. Name sounds pretty bland but this was compensated by the great food.
-----------------------
Our spa experience wasn't without an interesting moment. When the lady at the hotel reception told us we were getting a 30% discount as their actual spa facilities was under renovation, we should have hit the road. But we ended up in a makeshift spa - hotel room converted with two single massage beds, and one bathroom with a bath tub near the toilet seat.
We also booked different spa packages - I was laughing at Mouse because the one she chose had a "worm yogurt" treatment ("haha! worm yogurt! haha!") but the tables were turned when I realized my herbal bath had to be taken in the aforementioned bathtub near the toilet seat.
Me - *when being ushered into the bathroom for bathtime* "What's that?!" *points at bathtub*
Therapist - "You.. bath... this bath.."
Me - "But its shit colored water! in a bath next to the toilet bowl!"
Mouse - "Ha ha ha ha"
Me - *turns and asks therapist and points to Mouse* "How about her?! I .. bath .. this one .. how about.. she ??"
Therapist - "She... warm yogurt.."
Me - "Uwarghhhh!!!!!"
I should have known. Anything labelled herbal has gotta be unpleasantly colored.
See my pain. Sat in that for a good 20 minutes. Tried to keep myself distracted from eyeing the grout by collecting lime slices with my toes and sticking them on my fingers.
Ok Krabi wasn't unpleasant, only because the company made the trip worthwhile. I could have gone anywhere with Mouse and we'd have fun.
------------------
Came home and got diagnosed with food poisoning. Wtf.
So I spent my 26th birthday being ill, working 13 hours, sleeping 8 hours and the remainder 3 hours reading a mag and sitting at home. Your twenties is so overrated, I tell you.
I was 17 once I remember dying to become 25 or 26. Now I'm here and I realize you don't make it in your twenties. Some of us don't even make it in 50 years, depending on what your definition of "made it" is.
--------------------
Berjaya Retail listing. 22x PE, versus consumer average of mid teens. worldwide. 75% of business is 7-11 (only Msia exposure), 25% Singer. same store sales growth not disclosed - but most likely below 7% (based on average sales per store growth, which technically ain't the same thing as same store sales growth)
Singer??!
I actually thought they sell only sewing machines.
Me - "Where's the sea?" *peers out of airplane while we are circling the airport*
Mouse - "What sea?"
Me- "We're in Krabi. Aren't we supposed to be surrounded by sea on all sides?"
Mouse - "Krabi isn't an island."
Me - "WHAT?!??!"
Unfortunately my A for PMR geography didn't encompass learning about Thailand.
-----------------------
Our villa was nice, but it is so far in the boondocks. Good I guess if all you wanna do is bonk all day. We ended up hiring a driver to drive us around to a spa, Ao Nang etc.
Naturally being blessedly unfortunate souls we are, the one restaurant we went to hunt for had closed down. The one we ended up with was pretty good - Ban Lay Thai Kitchen. Name sounds pretty bland but this was compensated by the great food.
-----------------------
Our spa experience wasn't without an interesting moment. When the lady at the hotel reception told us we were getting a 30% discount as their actual spa facilities was under renovation, we should have hit the road. But we ended up in a makeshift spa - hotel room converted with two single massage beds, and one bathroom with a bath tub near the toilet seat.
We also booked different spa packages - I was laughing at Mouse because the one she chose had a "worm yogurt" treatment ("haha! worm yogurt! haha!") but the tables were turned when I realized my herbal bath had to be taken in the aforementioned bathtub near the toilet seat.
Me - *when being ushered into the bathroom for bathtime* "What's that?!" *points at bathtub*
Therapist - "You.. bath... this bath.."
Me - "But its shit colored water! in a bath next to the toilet bowl!"
Mouse - "Ha ha ha ha"
Me - *turns and asks therapist and points to Mouse* "How about her?! I .. bath .. this one .. how about.. she ??"
Therapist - "She... warm yogurt.."
Me - "Uwarghhhh!!!!!"
I should have known. Anything labelled herbal has gotta be unpleasantly colored.
See my pain. Sat in that for a good 20 minutes. Tried to keep myself distracted from eyeing the grout by collecting lime slices with my toes and sticking them on my fingers.
Ok Krabi wasn't unpleasant, only because the company made the trip worthwhile. I could have gone anywhere with Mouse and we'd have fun.
------------------
Came home and got diagnosed with food poisoning. Wtf.
So I spent my 26th birthday being ill, working 13 hours, sleeping 8 hours and the remainder 3 hours reading a mag and sitting at home. Your twenties is so overrated, I tell you.
I was 17 once I remember dying to become 25 or 26. Now I'm here and I realize you don't make it in your twenties. Some of us don't even make it in 50 years, depending on what your definition of "made it" is.
--------------------
Berjaya Retail listing. 22x PE, versus consumer average of mid teens. worldwide. 75% of business is 7-11 (only Msia exposure), 25% Singer. same store sales growth not disclosed - but most likely below 7% (based on average sales per store growth, which technically ain't the same thing as same store sales growth)
Singer??!
I actually thought they sell only sewing machines.
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